Divorced parents who opt for a joint child custody schedule often discover some challenges to making it work. Most of these difficulties stem from the complications of the custody and visitation schedule. These complications arise because in a joint custody agreement parents try to divide the time with the child evenly. This can create a confusing calendar with a lot of pick up and drop off times when the child switches time with the parents. However, the confusion can be cleared up and a joint custody schedule can proceed smoothly. Here are three suggestions for making that happen.
1. Start with a steady schedule. The beginning of the joint custody time is often the hardest. This is when the parents are trying to figure out how to make everything work and trying to remember what custody times they agreed to. It’s best to come up with a stable schedule as quickly as possible. Sit down and actually divide the time up exactly for each parent right from the beginning. Decide what days the child will spend with what parent and project the schedule onto a year long calendar. If there is a lot of variation in your schedule, still make at least a year long calendar for how you want the custody to go. And, use consistent pick up and drop off times to make it easy to remember.
2. Have a separate custody calendar. Once you’ve put the schedule you want for the whole year, fill out the rest of the calendar and keep it as a custody calendar. Do whatever it takes to be organized. Many times it is useful to have the different colors for the parents so you can easily see when the child is with what parent. Mark the times clearly when there is a pick up or drop off. If there is a change to the normal schedule (like with holidays or other special events), note it on the calendar and maybe put a note off to the side as well. This will help you always know what is going on.
3. Keep track of changes. After you have your initial system set up, it will be easier to incorporate any changes to the schedule. If a special event pops up and you need to change custody, you can simply write it in your calendar. Since you have a centralized location of your custody schedule, you’ll always know where to look for your information. You can relax knowing that there aren’t any little notes in your planner or on other scraps of paper that you need to remember. It’s all right there on your calendar. You may want to make the calendar on your computer so that you can easily print out another copy if there are a lot of changes. Then you can also print it out month by month.
Joint custody is generally agreed to be beneficial for the children of divorced parents. This type of arrangement lets the children have good relationships with both parents. This is something that is important for the children as they grow up. Since it is so helpful for the kids, it’s nice that the parents can create a schedule that is easy for them to manage and control. This makes everyone happy.
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